avad

Wow. Another gorgeous springlike day!
I actually dragged out the vacuum and supercleaned all the nooks and crannies in the house- corners and behind things and windowsills and such. If you knew how lazy I am about such things normally, you'd know something weird is up in my energy/motivation levels.
I open the windows and I feel warmth! I can take off my socks and I'm comfy in bare feet!?! Oh my, how happy this makes me!!

You see, it is the change of seasons that I love. I don't think I'd be happy in a place where it was always perfectly warm.
Spring and Fall are the exhilirating times for me- when everything feels ON THE VERGE. When air changes trigger these fireworks of memories in my mind. Spring in all the other houses I've lived in. I travel to each one in my mind...and I realize it's all about opening windows. The barn I lived in...ahhh, I can remember that feeling when I could open the door in the bedroom for the first time in the the Spring- the door that goes to that mini deck. Just to feel the flow of air in the long closed house! I remember I could never get enough air through that place though because the windows were all small- the little crank open ones that don't let direct air in.But downstairs I would just open the big doors up....and let it all in.

The other house I remember....opening the sliding door out to the deck and walking out there in pjs with my coffee mug in hand...setting it on the rail and looking out over the backyard...my love Mr.Meow (stray cat) coming to say hello.:) Or opening the little side crank windows on the bay window that was above the couch...and just hearing the sounds of outdoors...a dog barking...birds chirping...an airplane drone...

Which brings me back here, (moments ago when I wrote this in my bookjournal), sitting on the couch, sunlight warming my bare arm, lighting up the paper as I write...the sounds of birds, a car in the distance, the refridgerator hum...
And then I'm off again to the home I grew up in. Yes, on a day like this, I remember taking a walk in the backyard, just looking at things...looking at the trees and bugs on the fence and caterpillar sacks and sandbox....

I have all these places, all these details which I like to play like songs on my brain radio...But no, it's more than a song, because each time it's different, I can look and find other memory-details, I can take another route. But the smell of the air opens all the windows in my mind, on the breeze that rushes through my stagnant mind/house I am carried here and there, smelling memory flowers, visiting places that I have recreated inside myself with a detail that astounds me. My field of vision is boundless. I can shift my attention from the fence at my childhood house to the grass where it meets the ground...I can crouch down and see it even closer. What marvels the mind is capable of...each still shot is a framework/an armature for more specific memories/objects..The book I am reading now (Envisioning Cyberspace)discusses these very things and I am so glad because I am so fascinated by them.I will post excerpts perhaps at a later time.
*deep breath*
So you see,this is something I am also trying to express through my newest art...these arranged spaces in memory....and the potentials of cyberspace...creating tangible/accessible visual files for the memories of humanity....the houses, the environments, the details...The mind and the internet are the same thing to me. The internet is the growing structure that creates faster flow between minds....
*sigh*
Before I drown you all in words and perambulations,
Happy Spring.:)!