![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
avadThis is a journal entry of mine from a few years ago that a friend recently remembered and mentioned so I dug it up, to reread and refeel. It's called "IF".:
This morning I had a long phone conversation with one of my friends. He is looking for a life-partner, he is jaded from years of not finding. He says he longs for a REAL connection, a spiritual one. But he talks to me of eyes and hair and bodies when he tells me of his romances. He's convinced there are no women in his town. No women that are not obsessed with money or superficials. He wants advice. Says I'm the only one he can talk to like this. I love this friend. He is NOT shallow, he has amazing depths..... but something is not clicking in his 'search'. I believe our situations reflect where we are mentally. Sometimes you don't have to introspect in order to introspect. Sometimes you just READ your situation. Many times he tells me that he's lost the will to live. Today I suggest to him that this is where his challenge lies. That he must find something to live for that doesn't depend on any person's actions other than his own.It's a tricky challenge, and needs constant effort to remember but I think of it as the key to starting strange somewhat magical chain reactions in life.
There was so much I felt and wanted to put into words. So much that I was thinking about since I started exploring this open diary format. about love and searching... I wrote this after sitting awhile.
If.
If we could walk into a street/bar/cafe
with the same mindset as we sometimes walk into LJ
With a willingness to connect to others on the level of their deeper feelings, fears, hopes and dreams.
With a willingness to listen and care and try to help.
And a willingness to offer up our own feelings, experiences, hopes and dreams as honestly as possible...
In hopes they might be of USE to someone else.
If we were never distracted from this purpose by fear or apathy.
If we were never distracted by appearances.
If we could skip right over smalltalk and say what we really want to say, ask what we really want to ask.
If we could sometimes just quietly listen and learn and not say anything when we can't think of something to say.
If real hugs were as easy as cyberhugs and we doled them out in bunches to everyone struggling through life.
If we could see that our growth is SIMULTANEOUS and SYMBIOTIC with everyone else's. That when I try to help someone I am also helping myself. And when I help myself and talk about it, I am also helping others.
If we were to remember that in a lot of ways we are just like trees, with branches that can reach great distances and plop a pink flower on a lonely person's head. Or pat the back of someone who is overcoming obstacles.
If we would all keep in mind how we savor those notes and cybersmiles and 'laughs out loud'.....and throw the real life equivalent around the world.
If all of this reminded us to prioritize every day all that means growing, all that means reaching, all that means loving...
We would all probably find Love.
This morning I had a long phone conversation with one of my friends. He is looking for a life-partner, he is jaded from years of not finding. He says he longs for a REAL connection, a spiritual one. But he talks to me of eyes and hair and bodies when he tells me of his romances. He's convinced there are no women in his town. No women that are not obsessed with money or superficials. He wants advice. Says I'm the only one he can talk to like this. I love this friend. He is NOT shallow, he has amazing depths..... but something is not clicking in his 'search'. I believe our situations reflect where we are mentally. Sometimes you don't have to introspect in order to introspect. Sometimes you just READ your situation. Many times he tells me that he's lost the will to live. Today I suggest to him that this is where his challenge lies. That he must find something to live for that doesn't depend on any person's actions other than his own.It's a tricky challenge, and needs constant effort to remember but I think of it as the key to starting strange somewhat magical chain reactions in life.
There was so much I felt and wanted to put into words. So much that I was thinking about since I started exploring this open diary format. about love and searching... I wrote this after sitting awhile.
If.
If we could walk into a street/bar/cafe
with the same mindset as we sometimes walk into LJ
With a willingness to connect to others on the level of their deeper feelings, fears, hopes and dreams.
With a willingness to listen and care and try to help.
And a willingness to offer up our own feelings, experiences, hopes and dreams as honestly as possible...
In hopes they might be of USE to someone else.
If we were never distracted from this purpose by fear or apathy.
If we were never distracted by appearances.
If we could skip right over smalltalk and say what we really want to say, ask what we really want to ask.
If we could sometimes just quietly listen and learn and not say anything when we can't think of something to say.
If real hugs were as easy as cyberhugs and we doled them out in bunches to everyone struggling through life.
If we could see that our growth is SIMULTANEOUS and SYMBIOTIC with everyone else's. That when I try to help someone I am also helping myself. And when I help myself and talk about it, I am also helping others.
If we were to remember that in a lot of ways we are just like trees, with branches that can reach great distances and plop a pink flower on a lonely person's head. Or pat the back of someone who is overcoming obstacles.
If we would all keep in mind how we savor those notes and cybersmiles and 'laughs out loud'.....and throw the real life equivalent around the world.
If all of this reminded us to prioritize every day all that means growing, all that means reaching, all that means loving...
We would all probably find Love.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2004-01-25 07:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-01-26 05:32 am (UTC)hope this helped. hehe. :)
no subject
Date: 2004-01-26 08:53 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-01-25 09:26 pm (UTC)Both your writing and your visual/physical art are so very beautiful, thought-provoking and moving.
no subject
Date: 2004-01-26 08:54 am (UTC)thank you
Date: 2004-01-26 05:27 am (UTC)Re: thank you
Date: 2004-01-26 08:55 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-01-26 09:52 am (UTC)Your advice to your friend is perfectly worded. I had such disappointing outcomes from relationships that I stopped looking. I had to find things in my own life and company to be happy about. Now I have this sweet man in my life. Now life is nicer than I expected, but the most important factor is: I was happy with the way things were before he came along.
no subject
Date: 2004-01-26 10:11 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-01-26 11:50 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-01-26 11:58 am (UTC)