Aurora aurora aurora......

[avad]

Can anyone tell me why this would make me want to cry?
spaceweather

Shifts in our magnetic field....
almost seeing,remembering something...too quick glimpses of memory....flickering in my deep mind...
something so...indescribable...like whispers calling me...
and my chest aches so

Comments

[babayada.livejournal.com]

I think that there is a very real link between the experience of beauty and sadness. I think beauty touches something tender and fragile within us. And perhaps there is something about it that makes us know how tender, fragile, and temporary the experience of beauty is, how with every birth we are witnessing a death in the making.

When my nephew reached a certain age, I freaked out because I saw how beautiful and innocent he was and at the same time how the innocence and beauty were going to be harmed, inevitably, by the world.

There was a period, while he was staying with my family, when I had to excuse myself, go up to my room again and again, to hopelessly and hopefully cry my eyes out.

To be human, to experience life with an open heart is a tragic and wonderful thing.

Maybe the Buddhists are right? Maybe the heart was made to be broken? Maybe with each heartbreak, if we can let go of attachments, a layer of the heart is broken off, and we end up feeling deeper, having more compassion?

I really don't know.

I cherish moments that make me cry like that. Cartoons even do it now. Heh. It makes me feel alive.

Its strange how this developed in me over the years, because I used to not feel much of anything ... and I used to be much more coldly rational. I guess you got to give up something to get something sometimes.

[avad.livejournal.com]

that was so beautiful, thank you!:)

*sigh* I feel the same about my nephew! oh..
the heart just swells...and the life so delicate, fragile...it's painful!
makes me a bit afraid to have children, how can one bear such strong emotions Daily? Yes, it's something that develops, and something that we did a bit intentionally over the years to 'get' more beauty...and now, whoo, the overflows are often.

the aurora...it's the Mystery that gets me...this sensing of changes in a larger way...but not quite able to see the whole picture...the movements of energy on a greater scale...what we are a part of...it's so close...and I want to see/feel it all from 'up there'one scale...to hold this earth gently like a ball and feel the static and heat and breezes of it's charge by passing my hands over it barely touching, eyes closed....this energy is all of us thinking, feeling, moving in swirls and waves.....*sigh* it's so beautiful.

[babayada.livejournal.com]

If you have children you will be able to handle it. As a woman, you are part of the mystery of life. As Joseph Campbell said, women are life itself. We men are just sort of hanging around along side of life. LOL.

When the time comes, something will awaken inside of you. I am sure there will be unbearable moments, but you'll get through them.

I just realized recently the reasons for some of the behaviors I had when I was little. My brother went to a different school than me, and my mother would drop me off alone at home and then go get him. While she was gone I'd wait outside in front of the house, terribly anxious. For some reason I would think that she was never coming back. I'd imagine her getting in car wrecks and dying, things like that, and I'd pray and pray for her to make it home safe.

I'd often reflect and wonder why I did that. This past year I remembered that I'd overhear my mother arguing with my father and threaten to leave the family if things didn't get better. Somehow, in my mind, I had hooked up that she was going to "leave" as in die because of that.

I guess this stuff about the aura borealis, mystery, beauty, and loss stirred the subject up. To a child, the mother pretty much is the big mystery, movements of energy on a greater scale, and all of that. After all, the experience of the mother is the initial experience of the universe for most people ... more Joseph Campbell there.

[babayada.livejournal.com]

Oh ...

With your art, the higher perspective seems to be where your experience of beauty resides. Would you share what helped create that experience? Is there a fundational memory? I can remember my first experiences of being in a plane. I still can't get over the magic of flying, being above it all and seeing things functioning cleanly, wondering about the order of which we are all a part, how people see their lives from one perspective and that there is another from which to view things. It makes me believe that we are as much a part of pattern, a pattern of life, as ants and other organisms are. This pattern is a big mystery to me ... what is the larger mind?

I was recently watching a special on National Geographic about life by a water hole in Africa. There were crocodiles, lions, gazelles, elephants ... just about every conceivable creature there. They were all drinking together. Every once in a while, a croc would grab a gazelle, pull it in, kill it, and eat it. Everyone would freak out for a bit, then things would go back to normal.

There were no cops, no attempts to control the violence, no people getting therapy to recover. It was just the process of life. Completely pure. As I watched I began to see a kind of pattern, the circle of life, like a glowing set of interweaving circles within a plane of pulsating white light. I saw what was happening as life itself and it occurred to me that the experience of all that, the drinking, the hunger, the thirst, the killing, the companionship, the sex, all of it ... on a certain level was the experience of bliss and higher intelligence. Just like the experience of our cells (in which all this stuff is happening willy nilly) is US. Is intelligence, emotions, etc.

[avad.livejournal.com]

hmmmm I really don't know if there was one memory that triggered it...course as a young girl I used to tell the aliens it was A.O.K to come pick me up when they came around...that I'd like to talk. And well, picturing them looking down might've started something...;)
But through the years it always fascinated me and baffled me. Couldn't really understand how everyone seemed to be fine with the fact that we were all living our lives on a teeny portion of a spinning marble in the midst of endless space and infinite numbers of other marbles and fireballs and such. It just never felt um, like something you could forget.
Then, well, there are the dreams. Way too much to go into in notes...but so many amazing vision dreams that propel me further into examining and thinking about our place in the larger scheme of things...and evolution and existence..
There's a book that I would be struggling to write if it didn't exist, called 'The Global Brain Awakens' by Peter Russell that puts it all pretty much into the perspective I've come to really feel...as a glimpse, a scale-jump.